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The Godfather (of cruddy movies)

May 23rd 2008 05:19


The godfather is said to be the all time best gangster film of all time but I gotta tell ya that its not. Its all lies told by the Man in charge because they don’t want to admit that there are better films out there. Like scarface. Or street kings. Here is a list of things wrong with the godfather

1. it’s old. I mean, like really old. It was made in the late 50s so for a start theres no decent action in it. Sure some dudes get killed but you hardly see any blood and the whole things so old its virtually black and white.

2. marlon brando. You cant even understand what hes saying! Sometimes they don’t even speak in English. I wasn’t surprised when I heard they gave him the oscar for this only to take it back off him afterwards – hey I guess we all make mistakes sometimes, at least the academy admitted it in this case and confiscated the award back.
3. its so long! I mean like 4 hours long. They dance for a bit, some dude finds a horse head in his bed, then they eat some pasta and then they go to church. And that’s pretty much it!

Now compare this to scarface
1. scarface has a chainsaw in it.
No need for any other points. That automatically means scarface is better.

Now compare it to street kings
1. street kings is the greatest film ever made.
And the godfather isn’t, so once again, this automatically means street kings is better.

I tried to watch godfather 2 but I got too bored because they didn’t speak English in it AT ALL. Godfather 3 on the other hand was surprisingly good, mainly due to the appearance of a young tom hanks, who completely steals the movie, but still that dont save the whole trilogy.


if you want to see a decent crime movie check out street kings or rush hour.
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Scarface - wat a classic!!!!11

April 28th 2008 09:46
say hello to my leetel fren!


well since this is called oldmovies.com i thought i would actually reviw an old movie so all you know nothings could get off my back about it ok? today i am talking about the classic 60s movie Scarface. here is my trademark summary of the plot just in case you are a genuine hater of movies and are unaware of what this movie is about: Al Pacino is Scarface, a mexican gangster of epic porpotions who comes to America and is faced by the racism of American and he decides to fight back. It's an uplifting story and it teaches valuable lessons about standing up for youself and being a man.

Scarface is well known also because it was Al Pacino's first movie and he also won the Oscar for it. Pacino also made a sequel a few years later called 'Scarface II: Return to Mexico' but it is really hard to find and not many people have heard of it. ive seen it and its pretty good but youll probably have to just take my word for it because i doubt you will find it but thats what i'm here for - to illustrate and educate.

BEST BIT IN SCARFACE: Pacino goes to say hello to his little friend (prompting one of the movie's most famous lines) and his little friend is NOT happy to see him at all and he brings out a CHAINSAW. Some dude who is just hanging out with Scarface cops a chainsaw to his arm and its full on and Scarface is all like "Hey essay you cant do it!" and the chainsaw gets him in the face a little bit and this is why he gets the name Scarface. Its a classic moment and has been ripped off for many other films, almost all of them starring that dikhead Victor Caleoh.

TRIVIA: This was also Michelle Fyffer's first movie and she has a famous scene in it where all the cops interrogate her and she uncrosses her legs to show that she is rocking the muff sans panties. EXTRA TRIVIA: i got a mad boner from this.
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Angels with Dirty Faces

March 8th 2007 09:46
angels with dirty faces
Angels With Dirty Faces (1938)


A deadset certified gangster classic today... lately I've been catching up on all these films I havent seen, and I discovered that 'Angels with Dirty Faces' definitely deserves it's 'classic' status. Of all the pre-70s gangster films I've seen, this is the best one so far. Starring James Cagney (who had become a superstar by the time this film was made) and Pat O'Brien, this film also featured an early supporting turn by Humphrey Bogart and was directed by Michael Curtiz (who would go on to make 'Casablanca').

Rocky (Cagney) and Jerry (O'Brien) start their respective paths to adulthood as slum-kids and would-be mugs getting up to mischief in their local neighbourhood. One day they decide to rob a railroad car and they get sprung... the two young friends run for their lives, but Rocky gets caught. Fast forward a decade or so later and Rocky has become a bonafide gangster, a reform school veteran, ex-con, scourge of the police and hero to the poor kids in his old neighbourhood. Meanwhile, Jerry has become a priest, fighting to keep the same kids off the street in the hope that they won't choose lives of crime.

Rocky has just finished a three-year stint in gaol, and he comes back to the old neighbourhood to collect some stolen loot he left with his crooked lawyer. Rocky meets up with his old friend Jerry, and Jerry encourages the ex-con to help him save the kids - in particular the six young hooligans who have fallen in behind Rocky, hoping to learn the ropes from this gangster they idolise. Meanwhile, Rocky's aforementioned lawyer, Frazier (Bogart, suitably shifty), has grown wealthy off the money Rocky left with him, and has no intention of giving it back. How deep will Rocky fall back into a life of crime to get 'what's owed to him'? And will Jerry succeed in breaking the cycle of crime that sees gangsters give rise to each successive generation? There are no easy ways out in this movie, and it's all the better for it.

Perhaps showing it's roots as a play, 'Angels with Dirty Faces' is more plot-driven than the usual rise and fall gangster stuff of the 30s, playing on themes of reform and hero-worship to highlight a more specific message than just 'being a gangster will get you killed'. It's more morally-complex than that, going deeper than any gangster film before. It utilisises it's message as a proper, sincere and integral part of the story - rather than something just tacked on to please the censors (IE.'Scarface: The Shame of a Nation'). It also happens to be a really good film - full of action, laughs, engaging characterisation (especially the six young hoodlums) and memorable pathos.

Cagney brings his immense charisma to the role of Rocky, his screen presence perfectly matched to that of a gangster idolised by kids. His last small 'heroic' act of redemption - whilst not as brave a cinematic move as it could've been - is still a shocking and memorable piece of film history. Part of me was annoyed at how tame the film was in it's unwllingness to show screen legend Cagney as he cries and begs for mercy, but the stark and minimalist way in which it was treated conjured up some pretty powerful images in it's place.

A real classic, ranks up there with the best.
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Little Caesar

March 2nd 2007 05:54
Little Caesar
Little Caesar (1931)


One of the earliest non-silent examples of the gangster-film, ‘Little Caesar’ is a simplistic from-the-bottom-to-the-top-an d-then-back-again take on the genre, albeit a little less censored than some of the later golden-era gangster films (‘Little Caesar’ was made before the restrictive Hayes-Code was introduced in 1933). It’s probably best remembered for introducing audiences to the diminutive frog-faced Edward G. Robinson, who would have a long line in memorable crooks and dodgy kingpins


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A Bronx Tale

October 10th 2006 07:29
A Bronx Tale (1993)


You'll probably find 'A Bronx Tale' tucked away in the weekly section of your local video store - a fairly nondescript cover with only one 'big name' actor attached to it. Don't let this fool you - this is a quality film


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True Romance

September 9th 2006 11:11
True Romance (1993)


A lot of people mistakenly label this as a 'Quentin Tarantino' film. True, it's penned by the man himself, but it aint directed by him... and after seeing this, that's what counts! It just isn’t in the same league as Tarantino’s films


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The Public Enemy

September 7th 2006 07:27
The Public Enemy (1931)


From the posed profile shots of each character at the beginning, through to the jaunty soundtrack and Cagney's boyish charm, this is a vibrant and electric look at a boozing, brawling, roiling and roaring golden age of gangsters in the age of prohibition. Forget the cautionary text at the beginning and end of the film, the filmmaker's are no more interested in educating the viewer as the censors at the time were in appreciating film as a piece of art


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Scarface: The Shame of a Nation

August 29th 2006 11:38
Scarface (1932)


Despite the 50 years between them, 'Scarface: The Shame of a Nation' and Brian De Palma's gaudy 80s re-imagining actually have a lot in common. Their characters might have different names, they might inhabit different cities and trade in different commodities, and they might be of differing ethnic backgrounds, but the arc they both follow are strikingly similar - even down to the oedipal subplot. And both films were incredibly controverisial in their heyday - coming under fire by the censors for their violence and alleged glorification of criminal excess


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Miller's Crossing

August 22nd 2006 04:15
Miller's Crossing
Miller's Crossing (1990)


As a fan of gangster flicks (the mob kind, not the rapper sort) and the Coen brothers (‘Fargo’, ‘The Big Lebowski’, etc) I was glad to happen upon this weekly video a few days ago. The cover made it look kind of cheesy, but I was glad to find the film was nothing of the sort


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Get Carter

July 24th 2006 07:18
Get Carter
Get Carter (1971)


'Get Carter' is what many would call a classic. This is vintage Michael Caine, and this is vintage gangster filmfare. This film broke the mould on it's release, and ran miles in a direction a lot of other films wouldn't have dared to in their time


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Scarface

June 28th 2006 08:43
Scarface
Scarface (1983)


There's a certain level of notoriety that accompanies the 80s version of 'Scarface'. Whether it's remembered for Al Pacino's performance, the excessive use of the word 'fuck', oft-quoted dialogue about the ‘badguy’ and getting ‘the power’, or unprecedented levels of violence in a mainstream film, 'Scarface' (1983) is definitely a one-of-a-kind


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Once Upon a Time in America

May 23rd 2006 14:01
Once Upon a Time in America
Once Upon a Time in America (1984)
'Once Upon a Time in America' is an interesting and unique film. Clocking in at nearly 4 hours, it's hardly mainstream material. It also happens to be the last completed film by Sergio Leone, a celebrated Italian director who made some of the most famous 'spaghetti' westerns (IE. 'The Good, The Bad and the Ugly'). 'Once Upon a Time in America' is a New York-set gangster film, but it has a style of it's own that truly sets it apart from the rest of the genre...

The story isn't anything particularly new - some Jewish-American hoods form a gang and promise to stick together and work for nobody. From here we follow their 'career' as gangsters-for-hire throughout the prohibition era. Whatever the plot may lack is made up by the film's engaging structure. It starts with the collapse of the gang, flashing forward to it's sole surviving member thirty years later, and then flashing back to their beginnings. At first it misleads the audience and risks serious dangers of losing them, but as the film continues the audience is shown various gaps in the narrative - spots open to interpretation that surprisingly enhance the quality of the film. It's hard to explain without giving anything away, but it isn't as complex as it may sound, and it's a triumph of filmmaking that it works as well as it does


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